I am full of emotion this month. I am crossing into a new season of life. My season of babies in the house is over. I remember writing this post when my little girl started kindergarden. WOW! Was that really 4 years ago? WOW! Just. Wow!
My son should start kindergarden this year, but we decided that he is not ready. His birthday is at the age cut off and he would be the youngest in the class. He is also a shy little guy. Really it comes down to mom’s intuition right? I did not think it was a good idea. I’d rather wait now and avoid having him struggle over the next 12 years. That was our decision. Not that it is right or wrong. It is just what we decided to do. BUT we knew those were also the very reason that he did need to start pre school. He needs the social and academic challenges to prepare him for kindergarden next year.
So…. here we go! My little guy is going into PreK and little girl is going into 3rd grade. Bare with me as I cry.
My babies are growing up. I will not have any more baby years. No, I do not miss the diapers, crying for hours, baby food, and binky battles. Yes, I miss holding a baby in my arms, I miss having him/her sleep on my chest, the laughs at funny faces, and tickle monsters.
Now I get “Mom you are crazy” looks. I am told that I look funny. I embarrass them. They want specific types of clothing. They are vocal and opinionated.
GULP! I know I can handle this. God has prepared me for this season.
I will try to embrace this new season. Somehow. I will do what mothers have done for centuries. I will do what my mother and grandmother did. I will watch them grow and enjoy this time in our life.
But please allow me a little time to cry. I am sad. I am excited. I am full of emotions.
I love this passage, so I leave you with this:
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NIV)
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
My youngest goes into middle school this year. That means I have no more children in elementary school. It’s a hard pill to swallow. I’m not handling it well. I do wish to go back to the years you’re in right now. How are my daughters in their early 20s? I took my son to an open house at school the other day and I halfway called him his nickname as we were walking and said to myself not to say it so I stopped. A minute later, he said, “Mom, can you not call me that any more?” My heart broke! I’ll have to give him a new nickname that isn’t so “little kidish”. None of my other kids asked me to stop calling them their nicknames. I think them growing older reminds me that I’m growing older. I can’t also believe it’s been 11 yrs since I had my last baby. Time flies. Wish I could hug you! Just one day at a time and it’ll all become a new normal.
[…] A New Season of Life: No More Babies August 7 […]
Very well said Heather.
I think every mother recalls those times of transition. Remembering churns up a familiar ache.
Parenting is a strange and wonderful dynamic. If you think about it, it’s the only relationship where the goal is separation.
Your choice of scripture is perfect for this time of adjustment.